On my way. I told a wolf you were sick in bed. If you’ll be waiting at the door with your shotgun, I think you can have another nice pelt for your collection.
Dear Snow White,
Please stop buying from peddlars. We’re running low on cash, and besides, you have a bad habit of buying things that almost kill you. That’s why we hid the cookie jar before we left. If you’d like some cookies, they’re in the woodbox.
Love, the Dwarfs
Wanted: One mentor for coming-of-age young hero. Eager to learn, willing to work. White hair, long beard, and bushy eyebrows a must. Magical abilities a great asset. To apply please visit the nearest hovel at your convenience.
Stopped at the craziest castle last night. Demented queen thought I’d be the perfect match for her son. To test me she made me sleep on twenty mattresses piled on top a pea. Now she won’t let me go. Send help fast. The son is a perfect milksop.
Love, your Daughter
Dear Dark One,
Just a quick note informing you that I’ve found the Reversible World Domination Switch you so cleverly hid. By the time this reaches you I will have flipped it.
Sincerely, The Prophesied Deliverer
We won’t be home for supper. Met the Fairy Queen and she invited us home for tea. Should be back in a couple hundred years. Please don’t worry!
Love, Fran and Elsie.
Just a note saying His Highness and I will not be inviting you to our wedding next Saturday. Feel free to celebrate with the masses.
Say hello to my stepsisters!